Sad and spacey all day, I drove B crazy as we finished up most of our shopping tasks for our families. I just wanted sympathy, dragged myself through the day, through the fog. She felt I should have stayed home, was punishing her for my reluctance to shop. Getting cash at the end of the day, from the ATM, I was shocked at how low my balance was already, and began once again calculating all my fixed costs between now and my next likely check, drifting further and further from her presence, in the secret money-haunted tremors of my mind.